


in these arms i’ll always hold you

by orphan_account



Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mutual Pining, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-12 21:47:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29516226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: His eyes flickered around the room in distress, perturbation increasing as he squinted his eyes trying to adjust to the darkness that stilled in the room. His body inadvertently trembled, goosebumps pickled his skin forming on his arms. He jumps back startled, nearly falling off of the bed when he hears the bed creak.or in which riley comforts mac after he has a nightmare.
Relationships: Riley Davis & Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016), Riley Davis/Angus MacGyver (MacGyver TV 2016)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 57





	in these arms i’ll always hold you

Mac stirs violently, an inadvertent whimper falls from his lips as his head whipped from left to right, fingers roughly gripping at the pallid bedsheets of her bed. His heartbeat posthastes, his breathing quickened as he exhaled and inhaled prolonged straggled breaths. His leg twitches, salty sweat dotted along his hairline and moistened his face. 

“Mac.” He shifts, eyes squeezed tighter together at the sound of someone calling out his name. He shakes his head, swallowing thickly as he feels a lump forming at the apex of his throat. Salty tears sting as they gather in his eyes. 

“Mac,” The voice called out again this time with a more worried cadence lilting heavily in their voice. His eyes pry open, a trembling gasp emanates from his parted mouth as his body jolts up in haste when he feels a hand gently settle on his arms. 

His eyes flickered around the room in distress, perturbation increasing as he squinted his eyes trying to adjust to the darkness that stilled in the room. His body inadvertently trembled, goosebumps pickled his skin forming on his arms. He jumps back startled, nearly falling off of the bed when he hears the bed creak. 

“Hey, hey, it’s just me,” The voice says, soothingly, in attempts to cease his anxious worries.

The room’s illuminated in a warmth of light pouring from the lamp that’s perched on the nightstand. He shields his eyes from the harsh light, rubbing a hand over his heavy lidded, bleary eyes as he blinked repeated accustoming his foggy vision to the light. 

He opens his eyes to see Riley sitting athwart from him; face furrowing a concerned look. Her lips thinned in worry as she gauged at him. 

Mac’s gaze lowered as he ran a hand over his face in exasperation. He shifted his body slightly away from hers, chagrin suddenly beginning to accrue. He hadn’t had a nightmare like this since he was a teenager. 

The night terrors that haunted him then were always the worst. He would wake up with his body trembling, body drenched in sweat, heartbeat thrashing against his chest, tears pooling down his face while he sat there on the bed with his knees pulled to his chest as he rocked back and forth trying to calm himself down. 

Mac couldn’t understand why he suddenly felt so _small_ as he felt the smothering scrutiny of Riley’s stare piercing at the back of his head. His jaw clenched in anger at the realization of how emotional he was being. 

This wasn’t him. He had learned to repress his emotions and feelings upon growing up. He wasn’t supposed to be feeling like this, so scared and small. _God, why did it feel like he was about to cry_. He bit numbly at his inner cheek to keep his bottom lip from wobbling. 

He sniffled lowly, wiping frustratedly at his cheeks. 

“Mac, hey,” She says so softly like she’s afraid to speak too loudly in case it startled him. He _hates_ it, that she’s being so careful around him like he’s some fragile thing on the precipice of breaking.   
  
He can feel her crawling across the bed, making her way over to him. A sudden warmth envelops around him as she scoots closer. From his peripheral vision, he could see her extending her hand out and reel it back in apprehension as if she’s conflicted on whether or not to touch him.

She doesn’t. Instead she just sits behind him, quiet for a while. When she finally does begin to speak, the cadence of her voice is so low and soft that it’s barely audible and above a whisper. Any other person might’ve strained to hear what she was saying, but Mac was able to hear every coherent word that she uttered.

Riley sucked in a shaky breath, her body moving seemingly closer to his. “It’s okay to be sad, Mac. Jack was important to you––to both of us. I don’t want you to feel like you can’t cry or grieve or be angry-” 

“I’m fine!” He angrily snapped, quickly clambering to his feet.

Foggy tears blurred his vision as he looked at Riley. He shook his head, closing his eyes as his lip wobbled uncontrollably. “M’sorry,” Guilt and regret immediately washes over him.

He’s never raised his voice like that at Riley. “God, Riles, I’m so sorry.”   
  
He knew that his anger was misdirected. He wasn’t angry at Riley, he was angry with himself. Infuriated. Maybe if he was faster then he would’ve been able to save Jack. Maybe this empty feeling wouldn’t be consuming him, or the guilt wouldn’t be eating away at him. 

Jack had always been one of the most important people in his life, he was a father figure in more ways than his actual father was, a friend whenever Mac needed one, a confidant, a therapist––he was everything to Mac. 

Now that he’s gone Mac feels...stuck. Lost. Hopeless.   
  
“It’s my fault, Riles.” Mac laments somberly, his hands covering his face in shame. “I was supposed to––I wasn’t fast enough––I should’ve—”

Riley shook her head, refuting his accusatory opposition. “It’s not your fault. You didn’t know this was going to happen.” 

“That’s the problem!” He laments in melancholia. His voice quivers as if he’s on the precipice of tears. His eyes shimmer in a glistening sheen and tears silently spilled from his heavy eyes. “I w-wasn’t there. I wasn’t there to help him, Riles.” 

Riley climbs off of the bed and extends her arms around Mac, cradling his body in comfort while his body shook as tears pooled from his eyes. She rested her chin atop of his head as he buried his face against her neck. Hot tears moisten her skin and dampen her shirt but she doesn’t care. She just continues to hold him as he cries.   
  
He’s holding her as if his life depends on it. Arms wrapped tightly around her almost as if he’s afraid that if he lets her go she’ll leave him too. He already lost his everyone else in his life he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to live if he ever lost Riley too. 

He doesn’t care that he’s weeping pathetically in her arms unabashedly, clinging onto her, while his tears stained her shirt. Usually he was reserved about displaying any emotions but right now, cradled into Riley’s arms, he didn’t care about upholding the bravado facade. 

“it’s okay, it’s okay.” She murmurs in a reiterated litany, her hands stroking softly at his sleep tousled hair. 

She knows this pain all too well; she herself cried uncontrollably and was left with this empty raw feeling of numbness after Jack’s funeral. Her mind was clouded as she tried to occult the memories of hearing his rancorous cries in the comms, or hearing him whispering his goodbyes to them as he knew the results of the inevitable defeat. 

She knows how reserved and closed off Mac could be when it comes to feelings and she didn’t want to prod him any further, but she hopes that he won’t push her away in his time of need. 

It’s lonely, dealing with your conflicted emotions after the death of a loved one. She just wants to be the person to help him through if he lets her. 

They remain in that position for a while with her comforting him and him wrapped around her arms. Her legs started to go numb from standing up too long but she doesn’t complain. She just continued to hold Mac until his tears eventually began to subside. 

Mac’s body feel empty as he cries out just as much tears as he think his body is able to produce. He sniffles, lowly, peeling his dewy face away from Riley’s neck. He wipes away the remnants of his tears with the back of his hands, his eyes remained lowered as he untangled himself from her arms.   
  
There’s so much Riley wants to say, she wants to offer him some words of comfort but she could sense that he wasn’t in the mood for talking. She wouldn’t press him to do it. So, instead she reaches down and grabs hold of his hand. She gives him a small, sheepish smile as he nudged her chin towards the bed, gesturing for them to return back to bed. 

Mac nods, quietly and followed behind her as she lead them back to the bed. She climbs in first, drawing back the covers and swathing it over her body. She scoots over and makes enough room for Mac to climb in. He crawls under the covers beside Riley. His eyes were puffy and red from crying. His nose was stuffed. 

Her heart ached in sympathy for the pain he was enduring, wishing that she could somehow take it all away from him. 

But she couldn’t and she knows this. 

She flips over on her side and slides over so that she’s laying closer to him. He reciprocates the movement and faces her as well. They lay there in silence, their eyes staring deeply into the others with their gazes unwavering. She reaches her hand up and strokes a gentle caress against his cheek. 

His eyes flutter close at the soft contact. 

He swallowed thickly as he opened his eyes again, staring directly at her. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you.” He says, voice marring a regretful tone. 

She shakes her head, dismissively brushing it off in insouciance. “Don’t apologize for being in pain. Hey, I know it may not seem like it now, but the pain will stop eventually. When it does I’ll still be here for you.” She verbalized in sincerity, looking intently at him so that he knows she means every word. 

“C-Can you hold me?” He asks in a sotto voce. It’s the softest she’s ever heard him and talk and from the way his eyes shyly glance away from hers, she knows that he feels slightly embarrassed by this request. 

She nods, instantly, giving him another comforting smile to let him know that it was okay to be vulnerable especially around her.   
  
Riley shifts her position on the bed, now laying on her back as she’s propped up against a stack of pillows. She makes sure she’s comfortable before gesturing Mac to come over. 

He moves over, lowering his body and laying his head on her stomach. He curls his legs inwardly, tugging the covers over his body.   
  
He feels so safe and content as he laid there in her arms. She’s warm and smells of the coconut water scented body wash that she used in the shower earlier. 

He doesn’t go back to sleep that night, neither does she. They just laid there in bed awake, listening to the steady rhythm of each other’s breathing. 

**Author's Note:**

> i actually don’t know if jack’s character dies i’m still catching up atm but i just really wanted to write a fluff/angsty macriley fic. 
> 
> excuse the errors if there are any!


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